On August 31, 2008 two young women successfully defended themselves against attempted abduction here in Ann Arbor, Michigan.  Both women were out jogging in a normal, safe, residential neighborhood in a wealthy small town in the Midwest.  The 20 year old fought off a man who jumped out of the bushes.  Later that evening, the same man grabbed a 16 year old and forced her into his van.  She fought back and jumped out.  Both young women probably saved their own lives with brilliant quick thinking, courage, and a fast and forceful response.

Here’s the story in the Ann Arbor news.  May I recommend that you skip the lengthy comments section?  Not surprisingly, the public commentary on these success stories provides a perfect example of victim blaming, hatred of women and girls, and really bad self-defense information.

Lousy Self-Defense Pseudo Tip #1:
Don’t jog at night.

Reality:
The majority of attacks are by men you know, attacking you indoors during daylight hours.  If you’re really concerned about assault and trying to better your odds - you should feel most relaxed outside, alone, at night.

Lousy Self-Defense Pseudo Tip #2:
Females should never be alone.

Reality:
Uhmmm…. What planet are you living on?  No one, male or female, has the option to never be alone!  What is this – the ancient Greek model for protecting women?

These ridiculous suggestions (which seem to always be accompanied by outrage and a false sense of superiority) remind me of a friend of mine in high school.  She’d seen a movie once in which someone drove off a bridge, was trapped in the car by her seatbelt, and drowned.

She never wore a seatbelt again.

The self-defense equivalent is to shout at women “Never go out alone at night!”  It lends a false sense of security at best and at worst tells girls and women that they’re bad for leaving the house and have caused their own attack.

Jogging doesn’t cause rape.
Being alone doesn’t invite abduction.
Women don’t cause men to attack them by flaunting themselves on the sidewalk.

And seatbelts don’t cause traffic fatalities.

The best defense against attacks?  Fight back like they did!

Maybe inspired by the upcoming U.S. election and the 40th anniversary of the 1968 Democratic National Convention, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about violence prevention.  Some people are surprised to learn that I’m a committed non-violence and peace activist.  After all, the simplest level of what I teach includes how to kick someone in the head until he’s unconscious. 

OK, so that’s violent!

A meditation teacher helped me to reconcile that incongruence .  I’d shown her a video of one of my IMPACT classes, basically some quite intense, realistic and violent self-defense against attempted assault.  Lots of shouting and kicking and knock-out blows.  I have to admit I was nervous about her reaction; I was eager at the time to be perceived as a spiritual and peaceful person. 

We chatted a bit about karma –  including the long-term negative consequences for those who commit violence.  She pointed out that it’s not doing the perpetrator any favors to allow him to harm you, and that “sometimes the most loving thing you can do for someone is to stop him from hurting you”. 

And if that requires you to knock him out, so be it.

And of course the linkage between peace and self-defense is long and deep, here’s a wordy article from the Quaker community detailing the historical use of some of the terms.